The Armor of a Outdoorsmen

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The Armor of a Outdoorsmen

Postby OutdoorsmenBible » Tue Jul 15, 2014 10:07 am

Idea and design by Blake Alma

Y’all do know the Armor of God, right? (Ephesians 6:10-18) The Outdoorsman has armor too! The six pieces of armor will protect you for the wiles of the city. The six pieces of armor are: The Knife of protection and utility, the boots of manliness, the gun of hunting, the hat of awesomeness, the chewing of a wheat straw, and above all the word of truth! These six items will make you withstand the yuppie and city day!

The Knife of protection and utility: In your pocket shall girt a powerful to of protection and utility. A pocket knife is simply a knife that you carry in your pocket. “Why should I carry a knife in my pocket?” you may ask. Here’s why:

Protection from the evil city murders, Cutting items, Whittling

Manliness, Protection from animals, Utility

The knife of protection and utility is a great weapon to have with you at all cost!

The Gun of hunting: Unlike the knife of protection and utility, You can not carry it wherever you my go. A gun is a firearm to kill. You city slickers see cops all the time with a gun. Cops carry guns cause city slicker murderers kill and attack people whenever they want. You should simple just use a gun for hunting and hunting alone.

The Boots of manliness: As I’m writing this forum I’m currently wearing big manly boots . I where boots everywhere I may go, even in the hottest days in summer. “Man alive, I bet your feet sweat and stink all the time,” you thinking. Nope! After wearing them for awhile your feet gets used to them. My feet never hardly stink or sweat any more. Cool, huh? Now you're thinking, “ Why in the world should I ever wear boots?” Boots are for showing of your a Outdoorsman and no city slicker. So that no city slicker will ever talk to you as another city slicker. You hafta wear boots to show that you are an Outdoorsman.

The chewing of wheat: Now you’ve seen farmers and Outdoorsmen chew on a straw of hay, right? It just like your boots, it shows you are no city slicker. It shows you that they are a full blooded Outdoorsman. It also fun and cool to chew on!

The hat of awesomeness: Y’all seen John Wayne and his love for hats, right? Hey, you need to get a hat like that, Jack! Those hats are awesome! Whatever you do never wear a sports caps. Only, only city slickers wear sport caps. You need a cowboy boy hat or a camo cap to be a Outdoorsman. Wear a manly hat to show off your a Outdoorsman, and no city slicker.

The Word of Truth: Above all, taking the word of truth. (The Holy Bible) “Hahaha, there is no way I’ll ever take that anywhere, and I certainly would never read it,” you're thinking. Well then you will never a be Outdoorsman! The Holy Bible will keep you from the wicked ways of the city. It will! Name one Outdoorsman who is in jail because he broke the law. You probably can’t! Ok, name one city slicker who has broke the law. I can name a few. All of the big major crimes happen within the city. Such as 9/11. Not too many big crime happen in the country. You know why? Because, that’s where all the city slickers are at! I’m I saying it is wrong to be a city slicker? No, but most of the city slicker ways are wrong! Make sense? Do you want to be: Robbed, murdered, rapped, lied to, jerked around? Do you? I hope not! Read the Holy Bible it will keep you away from the evil city doings. Not only that, this book will keep you from it too!

Now you know the six armor piece of a Outdoorsman! Treasure these six items so that you may become a great Outdoorsman. Taken from Blake Alma's Outdoorsmen Bible, All rights reserve, do not use unless authorized by copyright owner aka me!
~Blake Alma
Founder of Godly Outdoorsmen Ministries
Galatians 5:22-23
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